I want to be free with my emotions when I'm with her. I don't understand why I'm not. I try to be, it just isn't happening. I always feel so "tight". I never know exactly what to say. She told me I've said everything I could possibly say to make her feel loved. I guess I'm trying to hard...but I don't want her thinking that I don't feel anything, because I do....I just don't know how to express it.

She had chemo yesterday. I got to take her and talk with the doctor. Our plan right now is to do another treamtment next week (assuming her levels are ok) and then the following week she will have a PET scan to see if the chemo is doing anything. We are finally getting to that point where you have to decide if trying to fight is worth what you are dealing with. She keeps saying she is praying that she will die fast. I understand and appreciate that, but oh my goodness how that hurts to think about.

"Spoken For"
by: Mercy Me

Take this world from me
I don't need it anymore
I am finally free
My heart is spoken for

Oh and I praise you
Oh and I worship you...

Covered by your love divine
Child of the risen Lord
To hear you say "This one's mine"
My heart is spoken for

Now I have a peace
I've never known before
I find myself complete
My heart is spoken for

Oh and I praise you
Oh and I worship you...

Covered by your love divine
Child of the risen Lord
To hear you say "This one's mine"
My heart is spoken for

By the power of the cross
You've taken what was lost
And made it fully yours
And I have been redeemed
By you that spoke to me
Now I am spoken for

Covered by your love divine
Child of the risen Lord
To hear you say "This one's mine"
My heart is spoken for
Take this world from me
Don't need it anymore...