More Refining

I know that the refining process is supposed to be a good thing and it is supposed to produce something good, but darnit...I'm tired of it.

It's been quite a while since I've written. Things seemed to be going along pretty well until WHAM! I was blindsided by something that even though a part of me knew it would happen, another part of me thought it could never happen. And wouldn't you know, it coincided right with the 1 year anniversary of my mama's home-going. I also lost one of the most special ladies in my life during those few days also. At one point I was just wondering what was going to happen next...talk about overwhelmed.

I wish I could just take my emotions for what they are and not try to always be analyzing them and trying to figure out every single minute detail. There are days when I'm happy, days I'm not so happy and days when I have no idea what I am thinking or feeling. I don't consiously feel stressed, but my body tells me that I am.

Today is one of those days that I mentioned before...a day where I don't know what I'm feeling. So it probably wasn't the best day to blog because I'm just not sure what to say. All I know for sure at this very minute is that God is faithful and He is going to walk me through this process, just as He has been walking, carrying me through the grieving process. I am thankful for that. Right now that has to be enough.